Giftmas

Christmas used to be one my favorite festivals. How I loved the homemade plum cake and homemade sweet wine that my friends offered me in India. The plum cake made in India is uniquely Indian, I have not tasted anything like it in the west. The carol singing and the cheap costumed Santa dancing to the Indian drums in a tropical place, going house to house looking for donations. Christmas was so much fun, until I moved to the west.

When I moved to the west, December quickly degenerated into a season that I truly disliked. Every year, I would simply wait for december to somehow vanish. I was not sure if I had to say “Merry Christmas” or “Happy holidays”. I could not understand the gift buying madness and people being so stressed out. And, the office parties were even more horrible. It was so put on.

Couple of years ago, I simply stopped buying gifts for friends, for any occassion. Bridal showers and baby showers were driving me nuts. I could not cope with the greed of people who wanted more and more. I thought I did not want to do something that messes up my mind so much. Probably this was the time frame that I was into Yoga 24×7. I am thankful to Yoga for putting me in touch with every single thought I have. Until then, even though I knew something bothered me, I did not know how to deal with it. Studying Yoga helps me quite a bit with understanding my thought process.

The solution I came up for the greed was to give folks homemade food or wine (storebought of course), flowers, gift certificates to restaurants and things that would simpy disappear after being consumed. I do not entertain gift registry any more. No, I will not buy the 28 inch pan with some special coating for anyone or the 2009 edition of baby monitor thingy to anyone. I checked myself out of the vicious cycle of gifts. I simply wished my friends would do the same. Not give me any gifts. If I did receive any gift, I started donating it to Goodwill or Salvation Army.

I read in the book “Health, Healing and Beyond” that Sri Krishnamacharya did not accept any gifts.

At one point, the King of Mysore offered a large piece of land, which he refused. A beautiful horse was sent as a gift – and sent back. Upon another occasion, the Maharani gave some beautiful jewels, and these too were returned. The only special favors he accepted were presents of fruit, vegetables and flowers. Anything more valuable might lead to dependence, loss of autonomy.

I do understand that giving a gift goes back in time and is really an ancient concept. The economies of many countries depend on how much spending is done to buy wanted or unwanted things. I do wish it would be kept simple enough for everyone to enjoy and keep the economy buzzing. I don’t know if there can be such a balance. I am happy to report that this is the first year in the decade that Christmas is not bothering me. I understand the entire mechanics and I simply let it go, to put it in yoga parlance. I have made peace with it.

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